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Pretty tired of talking like everything mattered ... Someone asked me today "poetry?" and I said "I don't know how I lost that bug."

We used to be a lot heavier into monstrosity but that was before we knew how find it in the dictionary.

I walked home today about a half a mile and the whole time I kept thinking about how my Seattle Mariners beanie flips up to one side and makes me look like a conehead.

I put on my pants (the same pair) for the third time this work week, it is Wednesday, and I think I just might go for the whole thing -- pants aged five days, they get a certain sweetness about them.

I took some NyQuil last night and woke up thinking about grabbing a steak knife out of the drawer and doing something mean with it but had a couple thoughts in the meantime:
-"Wait you are high on NyQuil [what?]."
-"We don't even have a steak knife."

Without NyQuil, the night before that I dreamed my brother had drowned at a swim meet and I was in the stands. Someone big and furious made a snide comment about drowning in a swim meet (which come to think of it is sort of funny). Over my mom's protests I challenged this lunkhead to an outdoor brawl, like in the movies. We had to push past all these high schoolers in swim suits to get outside and when we got out there the mook pulled of the hood and it was a Girl! And I couldn't fight the Girl because the Girl was a Girl so I went back inside to watch the swim meet and grieve about my brother. [He's fine in real life though.]

There is an expression called "upside surprise" in financial reporting. This is always worth a giggle.

Someone told me the other day "heart attacks aren't funny."

Antonio Banderas was at one point considered one of the sexiest men in the world. Is that still true?

I have not even gone on Billboard.com in over a month to see what's #1.

[.......]

T-Pain again!

I saw some pitstains the other day and they looked pretty natural.



Yeah.

In some sports the line is out in others the line is in.

Can you fix the way you look in that shirt?

A guy in a wheelchair on the subway today kept himself from drifting around the car by buttoning his coat around the vertical pole that is more commonly used for standing people. I wanted to ask him about the brakes but it seemed sort of a rude idea. He was in good spirits, though, so it would've been fine.

My room smells like excrement and has for several weeks, through no fault of my own (ask around, it's true).

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