Robert

One of my friends named Robert, who was 25 when I was 23, said to me "I could tell you stories. I could tell you stories like I was 90 years old."

One day I asked him for a story, and he told one about how he took a job working for a repo man out near Spokane. He'd been high on crank for several days and was assigned to unload stuff from a real bad crack house. Shortly after he arrived, the cops pulled up in the driveway and the home's owner pulled a gun on Robert and his employer.

"Whoa, calm down, bud," Rob said. "We're on the same team."

Rob then advised the man to throw the gun out the window and helped him flush the drugs down the toilet. Then he jumped out the window himself, the cops still banging on the door.