Friday, February 29, 2008
A Little More Gaddis
I'm not sure I'm happy about this, or other things like it. Still, kind of cute.
Deny the Reader
This is from William Gaddis' Carpenter's Gothic.
Gaddis evades the typical obligation to make definite statements. "What time is it?" the reader asks. Gaddis introduces the possibility that it is "not yet five," only to immediately cast the notion into doubt with "Had it stopped?" The same gambit happens with the mountain. "What is that thing we see in the distance?" The answer Gaddis gives is *shrug*.
Without letting on to any definite sense of time or space, Gaddis still gives the reader enough to go on. The time must be one that is mistakable for "not yet five," and the thing in the distance must be mistakable for a mountain. In spite of the wiggle room he leaves, Gaddis still pins himself down to a specific realm of possibilities. The mountain can't be a crabcake, for example.
This narrative style is aggressive and unnerving but makes the audience nervous enough to want to resolve the uncertainty. There's more, though; even if the reader knows he's being fucked with, there's very little to be done about it except to try to win Gaddis' game on his own terms, by prying some meaning from a text that pretty much overtly says, "I'm not giving you a damn thing."
See also.
When the telephone rang she'd already turned away, catching breath, and going for it in the kitchen she looked up to the clock: not yet five. Had it stopped? The day was gone with the sun dropped behind the mountain, or what passed for one here rising up from the river.
Gaddis evades the typical obligation to make definite statements. "What time is it?" the reader asks. Gaddis introduces the possibility that it is "not yet five," only to immediately cast the notion into doubt with "Had it stopped?" The same gambit happens with the mountain. "What is that thing we see in the distance?" The answer Gaddis gives is *shrug*.
Without letting on to any definite sense of time or space, Gaddis still gives the reader enough to go on. The time must be one that is mistakable for "not yet five," and the thing in the distance must be mistakable for a mountain. In spite of the wiggle room he leaves, Gaddis still pins himself down to a specific realm of possibilities. The mountain can't be a crabcake, for example.
This narrative style is aggressive and unnerving but makes the audience nervous enough to want to resolve the uncertainty. There's more, though; even if the reader knows he's being fucked with, there's very little to be done about it except to try to win Gaddis' game on his own terms, by prying some meaning from a text that pretty much overtly says, "I'm not giving you a damn thing."
See also.
It's Pronounced "Differently"
me: what's becoming jane
transgender thing?
Bumcakes: what?
no
its the movie about jane austen!
you're thinking of transamerica
Coming War Part 3
-A picture of Obama in a turban
-A media flap over the seemingly tactical deployment of his middle name, "Hussein," by Republicans
-Rumors he is Muslim have some kind of impact, maybe
Another chance for the American electorate to prove how easily it is tricked may be right around the corner.
Book Titles That Are Improved By Removal of One Word -- or Several Words
Love the Time of Cholera
The Grapes
Slaughterhouse
The Unbearable Lightness Being...?
Still Life With Pecker
Confederacy Dunces
Little House, Big Wood
As I Lay [or, better yet] As I Dying
Down, Moses!
Bonfire Vanities
Potter and the Prisoner
The Grapes
Slaughterhouse
The Unbearable Lightness Being...?
Still Life With Pecker
Confederacy Dunces
Little House, Big Wood
As I Lay [or, better yet] As I Dying
Down, Moses!
Bonfire Vanities
Potter and the Prisoner
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
The Old Notebook
Notes under the heading "Technique & Craft," dated 12-11-07.
This morning as per usual, Sulks and I and the Dasher went out for some Bloodies over on DeKalb, but there was a new bartendress there. The one we liked had short hair and was friendly and was hippie-ish with regard to undergarments, if you know what I mean. We (Sulks and I) were so taken with her that we went so far as to say she made excellent Bloody Maries, despite that the mix was premade and so the steadiness of her pour only had so much to do with our assessment.
The new lady, perfunctory and preoccupied, asked for our i.d.'s and then went back to doing prep work rather than pour our drinks. She gave us little candies after we paid the bill and Sulks asked, "Are these gum or candy?"
No response.
She must be new to the trade or else is so experienced that she has hardened and does not care whether several new boys on the block will come back.
------
There is an odd element to having been a bartender, which is the feeling that one is in position to judge the social and drinkmaking skills of other bartenders. To compensate for the wrongful feeling of entitlement, it is wise to tip amply.
This is what makes customers who have been in the business too long indispensable but insufferable. I am now one of those customers.
Shaking: -most effective way to mix indredients
-chills & slightly dilutes the drink
-never fill more than halfway w/ ice
-shake until drink is cold
Stirring:-marries flavors
-doesn't cloud the drink like shaking
This morning as per usual, Sulks and I and the Dasher went out for some Bloodies over on DeKalb, but there was a new bartendress there. The one we liked had short hair and was friendly and was hippie-ish with regard to undergarments, if you know what I mean. We (Sulks and I) were so taken with her that we went so far as to say she made excellent Bloody Maries, despite that the mix was premade and so the steadiness of her pour only had so much to do with our assessment.
The new lady, perfunctory and preoccupied, asked for our i.d.'s and then went back to doing prep work rather than pour our drinks. She gave us little candies after we paid the bill and Sulks asked, "Are these gum or candy?"
No response.
She must be new to the trade or else is so experienced that she has hardened and does not care whether several new boys on the block will come back.
------
There is an odd element to having been a bartender, which is the feeling that one is in position to judge the social and drinkmaking skills of other bartenders. To compensate for the wrongful feeling of entitlement, it is wise to tip amply.
This is what makes customers who have been in the business too long indispensable but insufferable. I am now one of those customers.
Ornette Coleman Throws Boulders Like a Snowman
Not much, just taking the sunlight in through the back window, listening to some "Congeniality" from the NPR Web site. Yeah it's sort of too bad, especially with the Sirius Satellite Radio ad at the beginning, but no one's YouTubed the mess so I'll take what I can get.
What Did One Mental Patient Say
To Another Mental Patient?
from Charles d'Ambrosio. "Screenwriter." The Dead Fish Museum: Stories. New York: Knopf, 2006.
"I don't like your mind."
"Yeah, well I'm not here for a pedicure."
from Charles d'Ambrosio. "Screenwriter." The Dead Fish Museum: Stories. New York: Knopf, 2006.
It's Eight in the Evenin' and I'm Already Heavin' -- The Bacon Movie
I've blogged about Bacon Skateboards before, lauding them as one of the top companies to look semiserious and cruise safely under the radar. As Ryan Sheckler and Rob Dyrdek sally forth on MTV on an apparent mission to make skateboarding into Bonfire of the Vanities as co-authored by Paris Hilton and whoever writes "Flavor of Love," some Northwestern durables keep breaking out footage that feels the same way skateboarding did on Sunday afternoons when homework could wait until tomorrow and it was too damn sunny out anyway.
For anyone who's been in the mood for just popping over manhole covers and not even trying to learn any new tricks, for anyone who still has love for the game, the entire Bacon full video is now available for free download via Skateboardermag.
Thanks, Bacon!
For anyone who's been in the mood for just popping over manhole covers and not even trying to learn any new tricks, for anyone who still has love for the game, the entire Bacon full video is now available for free download via Skateboardermag.
Thanks, Bacon!
I've Abandoned My Boy!
In honor of the Oscars and a film I have not seen, but whose previews consistently give me a chuckle, here's a facile laugh.
It's not super funny, really, but finally someone else realized "IVE ABANDONED MY BOY" is one of the great one-liners of our time.
It's not super funny, really, but finally someone else realized "IVE ABANDONED MY BOY" is one of the great one-liners of our time.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
I Leaned Right Over the Counter Just to Kiss You
Early on in the ongoing Brooklyn days, a friend of mine met a girl and got her email. After a few exchanges, she mentioned a Hold Steady show was going on in the next couple weeks, and asked whether he wanted to go.
Big reveal: He'd never divulged his HS fandom before, so it was clear she'd gotten her data somewhere else, likely an FB photo gallery with lyrics in the captions. No harm no foul, right? It was pretty much funny that this girl had been faced with a decision: "Do I ask him about the Hold Steady and let him in on my FB stalking?"
My guess is that this kind of behavior is only going to get less and less awkward. For now, though, it still merits a giggle or maybe a quizzical look.
Last night I got called out for doing some similar (but different, I guess) Internet tomfoolery and the shame was bananas. I guess these things happen but it is telling that blogs and Facebook have become a way for people to try to understand each other. Which is fine and all but there still remains a lot of explaining to do after you find out about the messy breakup or the flirtation with addictive chemicals via a Livejournal or whatever.
It's nostalgic, but maybe also somewhat productive, to remember a time when people were by and large more or less forced to speak with one another, out loud, to become friends.
Getting drunk together helped and still helps.
Big reveal: He'd never divulged his HS fandom before, so it was clear she'd gotten her data somewhere else, likely an FB photo gallery with lyrics in the captions. No harm no foul, right? It was pretty much funny that this girl had been faced with a decision: "Do I ask him about the Hold Steady and let him in on my FB stalking?"
My guess is that this kind of behavior is only going to get less and less awkward. For now, though, it still merits a giggle or maybe a quizzical look.
Last night I got called out for doing some similar (but different, I guess) Internet tomfoolery and the shame was bananas. I guess these things happen but it is telling that blogs and Facebook have become a way for people to try to understand each other. Which is fine and all but there still remains a lot of explaining to do after you find out about the messy breakup or the flirtation with addictive chemicals via a Livejournal or whatever.
It's nostalgic, but maybe also somewhat productive, to remember a time when people were by and large more or less forced to speak with one another, out loud, to become friends.
Getting drunk together helped and still helps.
Stuff White People Like
A friend indicated to me that Stuff White People Like is no longer just a series of stereotypes; it is also a blog.
Let's just get it out of the way that white people, as defined by this blog, like this blog.
Moving on: this is the sort of unimaginative conception of race that actually winds up hurting us. Example: "Difficult breakups." Really? I guess the theory behind the humor there is that white people are self-absorbed and self-important, and that we, i.e. white people (yeah I'm white! Hi world!), are too dramatic about love or whatever. Still, I've never heard anyone say "White people care too much about relationships." That is patently not a phenomenon. But this blog wants it to be, so it is.
But as opposed to whom? Asians? Black people? Hispanics? Where is the redeeming quality in race-baiting satire (which I often find funny) if there isn't even a palpable referent? This blog appears to do little besides create new stereotypes.
Another one: Expensive sandwiches! You could make a class argument here, but I'm not really seeing the chi chi turkey swiss get turned down by a lot of people, fishbelly or otherwise.
Admittedly, this site is a little cute. But I'm having trouble imagining what kind of person I'd be if I checked back regularly.
Let's just get it out of the way that white people, as defined by this blog, like this blog.
Moving on: this is the sort of unimaginative conception of race that actually winds up hurting us. Example: "Difficult breakups." Really? I guess the theory behind the humor there is that white people are self-absorbed and self-important, and that we, i.e. white people (yeah I'm white! Hi world!), are too dramatic about love or whatever. Still, I've never heard anyone say "White people care too much about relationships." That is patently not a phenomenon. But this blog wants it to be, so it is.
But as opposed to whom? Asians? Black people? Hispanics? Where is the redeeming quality in race-baiting satire (which I often find funny) if there isn't even a palpable referent? This blog appears to do little besides create new stereotypes.
Another one: Expensive sandwiches! You could make a class argument here, but I'm not really seeing the chi chi turkey swiss get turned down by a lot of people, fishbelly or otherwise.
Admittedly, this site is a little cute. But I'm having trouble imagining what kind of person I'd be if I checked back regularly.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Two Things
First: Strokes w/ Regina: "Modern Girls": I don't even feel a little guilty about this one.
Second: Puffy Shoe is dispatching the local paperboy to throw resumes on the porches of New York media outlets. If you know anyone looking for a video editor, funnyman, food-taster and/or semiserious journalist, holler. (For once I do not refer to myself.) Please help out, the dude will make a good neighbor.
Second: Puffy Shoe is dispatching the local paperboy to throw resumes on the porches of New York media outlets. If you know anyone looking for a video editor, funnyman, food-taster and/or semiserious journalist, holler. (For once I do not refer to myself.) Please help out, the dude will make a good neighbor.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Discarded Words, Phrases
It's not uncommon for a person to adopt a phrase or word only to let it fall away after excessive, repetitive and gratuitous use. A word or phrase that appears sufficiently unique will serve as a mark of distinction, at least until enough people ask what it means.
Here are some of the phrases I've dropped frequently and then dropped altogether.
"A veritable cornucopia" - don't really miss that one.
" ... or something" - used to hedge when giving an especially harsh opinion. I give fewer harsh opinions now (or maybe I just do less hedging).
"Sad business" - a sad state of affairs, used as a direct object. I still like this one, but I think I still wore it out.
"Bad business" - basically sad business.
"Shut up you dumb idiot" - probably not hard to imagine why that one didn't last.
"(verb) the pants off (noun/pronoun)" - a coworker actually told me that one was inappropriate!
"I make it rain" - 2006.
"I roll like a boss" - 2005.
"Get pumped" - There was a time when I felt it was important to encourage people to get pumped as often as possible. I'm not sure when or why that time ended. It was a good time. Getting pumped is almost always a good decision.
"Strong move" - Still in currency but soon to be tossed in the heap.
"There are 6 million women in New York" - I mean, come on. Honestly.
Got your own discarded phrase? Drop it in the comments below! I'll read it! And say it. For you.
Here are some of the phrases I've dropped frequently and then dropped altogether.
"A veritable cornucopia" - don't really miss that one.
" ... or something" - used to hedge when giving an especially harsh opinion. I give fewer harsh opinions now (or maybe I just do less hedging).
"Sad business" - a sad state of affairs, used as a direct object. I still like this one, but I think I still wore it out.
"Bad business" - basically sad business.
"Shut up you dumb idiot" - probably not hard to imagine why that one didn't last.
"(verb) the pants off (noun/pronoun)" - a coworker actually told me that one was inappropriate!
"I make it rain" - 2006.
"I roll like a boss" - 2005.
"Get pumped" - There was a time when I felt it was important to encourage people to get pumped as often as possible. I'm not sure when or why that time ended. It was a good time. Getting pumped is almost always a good decision.
"Strong move" - Still in currency but soon to be tossed in the heap.
"There are 6 million women in New York" - I mean, come on. Honestly.
Got your own discarded phrase? Drop it in the comments below! I'll read it! And say it. For you.
Pentathlon Upshot
The 'thlon was a success. Too great, in fact: I will not denigrate it to blog-post status.
However, I will mention that Daniel has restarted his own blog.
To conclude:
-Solaar
Good luck to all.
However, I will mention that Daniel has restarted his own blog.
To conclude:
"Je ne veux pas aller au service militaire, je ne veux pas faire la guerre pour un morceau de terre."
-Solaar
Good luck to all.
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Coming War Part 2
Out in Texas, I'm being chewed out by an Obama campaign constable and sometimes friend for not having voted in New York. Turns out, even if I had, I might not have.
According to reports from several Obama staffers who worked the Nevada campaign and an official filing by the campaign's lawyers, New York is not the only place where shit's a mess.
If it keeps up like this, come August, I'm going to Denver, and I'm getting arrested.
According to reports from several Obama staffers who worked the Nevada campaign and an official filing by the campaign's lawyers, New York is not the only place where shit's a mess.
If it keeps up like this, come August, I'm going to Denver, and I'm getting arrested.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Coming War
"Cheat to Win"
--An old friend
This reminds me of a book I once read.
The superdelegates factor, coupled with the Democratic party's oddball screwup of Florida and Michigan - two notorious swing states that have been the center of America's frightening political battleground - means we may be in for a serious brawl come summer.
The Dem convention itself shows potential as an old-school 20th century affair. Shysty hucksters will prowl around and both candidates will pursue any back door cut to sneak into a nom.
As in the past, this may mark occasion for true lines to be drawn. The badminton net is being cast, the poles shoved in the ground. Pundits will say that peepants scaredycats line up behind their mother figure on one side while the fresher types give a chance to a darker shade of idealizm. Thing is, the pundits might for once turn out to be right.
2000 and 2004 emphatically displayed to everyone the imperfections (to be delicate) of the U.S. general electoral system. 2008 may blast us back to an era when there were evident and frightening moral chasms to conquer in the mere primaries.
Unlike in olympiads past, though, it's starting to look like the kids might have something to say this time.
"They were wasting those longhairs / I just happened to be there."
Nanananananana
-At a work function last night, I shook hands with a multi-millionaire, and we discussed Texas Hold Em, briefly. It was a true "slobs vs. snobs" moment! Just kidding. Well, kind of. Okay yeah I'm kidding. But not about the shaking hands part. I did do that.
-From where I lay, I can see the constructors building the beginnings of a cement wall. I wonder if they will vote for Obama.
-Two people have said "Happy Valentine's Day" to me today, and Sulky hasn't even woken up yet!
-For reasons unclear, this week has failed to end in a sufficiently prompt manner. I'm currently lecturing it on the importance of punctuality.
-The Feehan pentathlon approaches. Prepare for rip-roaring accounts here and perhaps a full-on docudrama on HBO (okay probably YouTube).
-Sometimes you just gotta walk in the rain and see the size of the city you're in. Other times you just gotta wear plaid pants with a plaid shirt. In both cases, it helps to have a plane ticket out of town in your pocket (or on the Internet).
-Everything is not so bad!
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
From the Sis
Feel-good:
hey hey,
i'm wondering what you have to say about writing a letter of intent. do you have a sample one of yours?
mom met a rwandan who works on water management...long story short, he told her he wants to hire me. all in a trip to chile. go figure eh?
talk soon
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Cowardice
In college I had a roommate that no one in my house liked. We found him on Craigslist and he was a graduate student. He was a Democrat and watched Fox News after a day of classes. He had Swiss citizenship and cooked meals for other international students (girls) and then took them down to his room to sleep with.
I lived in the basement across the hall from him and another roommate lived down the hall. We all shared a bathroom that no one cleaned.
After several months, the carbon monoxide alarm began going off in the basement. Eventually I got tired of the noise and so detached the alarm from the ceiling and placed it on the front stoop.
Several days and nights passed, and everyone in the basement slept quite soundly.
Coming in through the front door one day, the Swiss roommate finally noticed the smoke detector. "Hey, why is this out here?" he asked.
I was playing video games. "Because the CO alarm keeps going off."
"How long has the detector been outside?"
"Since Sunday."
He did not pick up the smoke detector or bring it back in the house. He just walked back to the kitchen to make some pasta.
He almost never washed the pans.
I lived in the basement across the hall from him and another roommate lived down the hall. We all shared a bathroom that no one cleaned.
After several months, the carbon monoxide alarm began going off in the basement. Eventually I got tired of the noise and so detached the alarm from the ceiling and placed it on the front stoop.
Several days and nights passed, and everyone in the basement slept quite soundly.
Coming in through the front door one day, the Swiss roommate finally noticed the smoke detector. "Hey, why is this out here?" he asked.
I was playing video games. "Because the CO alarm keeps going off."
"How long has the detector been outside?"
"Since Sunday."
He did not pick up the smoke detector or bring it back in the house. He just walked back to the kitchen to make some pasta.
He almost never washed the pans.
Insanity
I read somewhere once that insanity, the kind where people do things like yell strange words in the middle of a park with their pants around their ankles, is actually pretty simple.
An otherwise healthy person develops (or convinces his brain he's developed) a positive response to the emotions he feels when he's suffering humiliation. So, for example, when most people fall on their butts while they're giving a presentation in front of a group of respectable citizens, they feel ashamed and sad because they know their audience's derisive thoughts.
A crazy person, on the other hand, falls on his butt and, seeing the haughty smirks, decides he likes seeing those smirks and carries on falling on his butt. It's sort of understandable and probably a little liberating to pursue this course.
This theory at least explains why people who are not crazy are made so uncomfortable by the presence of the insane; the insane are unbounded by the restraints that sane people still have to deal with. Their lives are unmistakably sad; we know that and they know that. The pain is real - they may often be hungry or lack shelter. They feel that another kind of human contact and fulfillment eludes them. But underneath those surface differences, the regular people are nervous and scared, because they are frightfully close to feeling the same inclinations toward self-destruction.
Also, it may very well be that a person's degree of insanity varies with his or her environment. I'm not talking childhood here, either. I mean on an instant-to-instant basis a person will feel more or less affinity to the humiliation impulse based on who or what happens to be around.
If that is true, everybody be careful.
An otherwise healthy person develops (or convinces his brain he's developed) a positive response to the emotions he feels when he's suffering humiliation. So, for example, when most people fall on their butts while they're giving a presentation in front of a group of respectable citizens, they feel ashamed and sad because they know their audience's derisive thoughts.
A crazy person, on the other hand, falls on his butt and, seeing the haughty smirks, decides he likes seeing those smirks and carries on falling on his butt. It's sort of understandable and probably a little liberating to pursue this course.
This theory at least explains why people who are not crazy are made so uncomfortable by the presence of the insane; the insane are unbounded by the restraints that sane people still have to deal with. Their lives are unmistakably sad; we know that and they know that. The pain is real - they may often be hungry or lack shelter. They feel that another kind of human contact and fulfillment eludes them. But underneath those surface differences, the regular people are nervous and scared, because they are frightfully close to feeling the same inclinations toward self-destruction.
Also, it may very well be that a person's degree of insanity varies with his or her environment. I'm not talking childhood here, either. I mean on an instant-to-instant basis a person will feel more or less affinity to the humiliation impulse based on who or what happens to be around.
If that is true, everybody be careful.
Pentathlete Profile: Steve Thomas
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #6: Steve "Even Keel" Thomas
Hails from: Buffington, Connecticut; Snobberton, Delaware; The Street.
Get to know Steve...
By Day: drifter
By Sport: Bandwagon Boston-area Teams, Cockfighting, Dueling
Pentathletic Strengths: Intimidation. Steve is equally intimidated by each event. Ergo, he is well-balanced.
Professed weakness: Steve is a sucker for Hillary Clinton speeches. They stir him so much that he will abandon task or team to listen to her.
Intangibles: Which Steve Thomas will show up? The raging alcoholic drifter, the disciplined mustachioed Academic, or the uncompromising neoconservative we've all grown to tolerate?
Quotable Steve: "When do we get the freakin' guns?"
Did you know?: Steve has successfully posed his way as a Georgetown student through 7 semesters.
Pentathlete #6: Steve "Even Keel" Thomas
Hails from: Buffington, Connecticut; Snobberton, Delaware; The Street.
Get to know Steve...
By Day: drifter
By Sport: Bandwagon Boston-area Teams, Cockfighting, Dueling
Pentathletic Strengths: Intimidation. Steve is equally intimidated by each event. Ergo, he is well-balanced.
Professed weakness: Steve is a sucker for Hillary Clinton speeches. They stir him so much that he will abandon task or team to listen to her.
Intangibles: Which Steve Thomas will show up? The raging alcoholic drifter, the disciplined mustachioed Academic, or the uncompromising neoconservative we've all grown to tolerate?
Quotable Steve: "When do we get the freakin' guns?"
Did you know?: Steve has successfully posed his way as a Georgetown student through 7 semesters.
Pentathlete Profile: Wade Greenlee
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #5: Wade "Thunder" Greenlee
Hails from: Chicago, Tokyo, Central Tejas
Get to know Wade...
By Day: Wade herds cats in the US Army
By Sport: Cricket, Sand-Pounding, Hot Dog Eating (for enjoyment's sake, with relish)
Pentathletic Strengths: Wade is strong.
Professed weakness: After a beaning in Tokyo League Baseball in 2002, Wade can no longer speak English.
Intangibles: According to his trainer and the Mitchell report, Wade is fueled by liquid anger, injected intravenously. When confronted with this accusation, Wade smash camera.
Quotable Wade: (loosely translated) "Consider please honor in competletion. Feel Enjoy! Thanks four corporation."
Did you know?: Wade does the Super Bowl Shuffle to entice his wife, romantically speaking.
Pentathlete #5: Wade "Thunder" Greenlee
Hails from: Chicago, Tokyo, Central Tejas
Get to know Wade...
By Day: Wade herds cats in the US Army
By Sport: Cricket, Sand-Pounding, Hot Dog Eating (for enjoyment's sake, with relish)
Pentathletic Strengths: Wade is strong.
Professed weakness: After a beaning in Tokyo League Baseball in 2002, Wade can no longer speak English.
Intangibles: According to his trainer and the Mitchell report, Wade is fueled by liquid anger, injected intravenously. When confronted with this accusation, Wade smash camera.
Quotable Wade: (loosely translated) "Consider please honor in competletion. Feel Enjoy! Thanks four corporation."
Did you know?: Wade does the Super Bowl Shuffle to entice his wife, romantically speaking.
Finally!
It finally occurred to me to embed Len's "If You Steal My Sunshine" on this blog.
There is an insidious movement among people wanting to impress others with the eclecticism of their taste. Its (the movement's) followers profess to like any number of songs for shock value. I am not being coy. I have not even made a point yet.
And I am done discussing. Enjoy yourselves some Len.
There is an insidious movement among people wanting to impress others with the eclecticism of their taste. Its (the movement's) followers profess to like any number of songs for shock value. I am not being coy. I have not even made a point yet.
And I am done discussing. Enjoy yourselves some Len.
Pentathlete Profile: Brendan Boundy
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #4: Brendan "Doubting Thomas" Boundy
Hails from: The District of Columbia, The Philly, The Newtown Square, PA
Get to know Brendan...
By Day: Brendan is a whip for the party, the pants party, the party in his pants.
By Sport: Crew, Gerrymandering
Pentathletic Strengths: Brendan fouls really hard on the basketball court to compensate for shortcomings in skill. This may not translate to the pentathlon, but watch your knees.
Professed weakness: Brendan sucks.
Intangibles: Brendan's lankiness is an unknown, whether it will help our hurt his efforts or lack of effort.
Quotable Brendan: "Watch your knees."
Did you know?: Brendan's recent Obama campaign contribution was rejected because of his romantic links to a "pimped out" Chelsea Clinton.
Pentathlete #4: Brendan "Doubting Thomas" Boundy
Hails from: The District of Columbia, The Philly, The Newtown Square, PA
Get to know Brendan...
By Day: Brendan is a whip for the party, the pants party, the party in his pants.
By Sport: Crew, Gerrymandering
Pentathletic Strengths: Brendan fouls really hard on the basketball court to compensate for shortcomings in skill. This may not translate to the pentathlon, but watch your knees.
Professed weakness: Brendan sucks.
Intangibles: Brendan's lankiness is an unknown, whether it will help our hurt his efforts or lack of effort.
Quotable Brendan: "Watch your knees."
Did you know?: Brendan's recent Obama campaign contribution was rejected because of his romantic links to a "pimped out" Chelsea Clinton.
Self Stroking
How acceptable is it to live in New York and suddenly relate powerfully to Strokes songs? I'm guessing it's a shameful disgrace akin to the one I feel for enjoying "The Office."
Art that convincingly replicates life carries with it a danger. If the art convinces you, it's won, whether it's right or not.
I AINT WASTIN NO MORE TIIIIIIME
aka
PAM LETS GO ON A DATE I AM SUPER TALL! OUR BOSS IS ANNOYING!
Art that convincingly replicates life carries with it a danger. If the art convinces you, it's won, whether it's right or not.
I AINT WASTIN NO MORE TIIIIIIME
aka
PAM LETS GO ON A DATE I AM SUPER TALL! OUR BOSS IS ANNOYING!
Just a Quick BQ
"All these veteran heads keep telling me to get off the speed because it's dangerous, but every time I have something to say to them late at night, they're passed out."
HST
HST
Monday, February 11, 2008
"Fuck My Balls"
Sulky: dude, "Fuck My Balls"
is 11 minutes long
me: fuck my balls
hahahaha
that would hurt!
Sulky: "do you wanna fuck my balls!?! / yeah i wanna fuck your balls"
me: hahahaahhahahaha
Sulky: i can hear u laughing
11:47 PM
me: fuck my balls
Sulky: fuck my balls
me: that is the stupidest thing
Sulky: like why didn't they just say suck
me: not extreme enough
Sulky: LETS SAY FUCK
me: fuck me in my balls
girl
Sulky: FUCK MY BALLS
me: fuck both my balls
Sulky: fuck my balls
me: fuck my balls!
do you wanna fuck my
balls
yeah
i wanna
fuck your balls
Sulky: OK
me: fuck my balls
Sulky: I am
me: what are you waiting for
Sulky: : )
me: you
you fucked my balls!
Sulky: : ) : )
me: fuck my balls!
Sulky: i'm imagining him saying it
11:58 PM
me: i think i should be allowed to blog this convo
Sulky: go for it
just leave out the beginning
me: yeah
Sulky: and maybe don't use the name
me: i won't use the name
i'll be tactful
is 11 minutes long
me: fuck my balls
hahahaha
that would hurt!
Sulky: "do you wanna fuck my balls!?! / yeah i wanna fuck your balls"
me: hahahaahhahahaha
Sulky: i can hear u laughing
11:47 PM
me: fuck my balls
Sulky: fuck my balls
me: that is the stupidest thing
Sulky: like why didn't they just say suck
me: not extreme enough
Sulky: LETS SAY FUCK
me: fuck me in my balls
girl
Sulky: FUCK MY BALLS
me: fuck both my balls
Sulky: fuck my balls
me: fuck my balls!
do you wanna fuck my
balls
yeah
i wanna
fuck your balls
Sulky: OK
me: fuck my balls
Sulky: I am
me: what are you waiting for
Sulky: : )
me: you
you fucked my balls!
Sulky: : ) : )
me: fuck my balls!
Sulky: i'm imagining him saying it
11:58 PM
me: i think i should be allowed to blog this convo
Sulky: go for it
just leave out the beginning
me: yeah
Sulky: and maybe don't use the name
me: i won't use the name
i'll be tactful
It's Funny
I'm reminded today of a subway ride a few days back. A Chinese guy was on the train but didn't know which way we were headed. I told him, with gestures, that we were going to Manhattan.
A few minutes later, another man who had watched the incident came over to me and told me he thought the Chinese man was confused and we should get a cop. To avoid involving the cops in what looked like a basic problem of language, I made the Chinese guy come over to me and point out his destination on the map. Flushing! No problem.
The woman who had to move her head so the Chinese guy could point looked at me and said with not a little contempt, "I think he knows what he's doing."
I didn't say much to anyone for a while after that, even when I'd been at work for several hours. Instead I made myself several cups of tea and concentrated on the Internet.
A few minutes later, another man who had watched the incident came over to me and told me he thought the Chinese man was confused and we should get a cop. To avoid involving the cops in what looked like a basic problem of language, I made the Chinese guy come over to me and point out his destination on the map. Flushing! No problem.
The woman who had to move her head so the Chinese guy could point looked at me and said with not a little contempt, "I think he knows what he's doing."
I didn't say much to anyone for a while after that, even when I'd been at work for several hours. Instead I made myself several cups of tea and concentrated on the Internet.
Playwright's
The only thing to do after suffering a humiliating defeat at English was to make an effort at self-betterment. Here are the fruits of that effort.
Wright is a Middle English word meaning "worker." All is forgiven, bar. You are probably a fine bar to drink at and to refer to in proper English. You are certainly not a failed attempt at a joke. My bad!
Wright is a Middle English word meaning "worker." All is forgiven, bar. You are probably a fine bar to drink at and to refer to in proper English. You are certainly not a failed attempt at a joke. My bad!
Playwright's
I am an idiot and playwright is spelled that way so feel free to slap me or just go ahead and read the below post and laugh at how much of a dummy I am.
In other words, RETRACTION.
In other words, RETRACTION.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Playwright's
There is a series of pubs in Manhattan. These pubs call themselves "Playwright's."
I'm all for misspelling words for some specific purpose. Kids' Korner, for example - replacing the C in Corner with a K creates some visual interest by making both words start with the same letter.
With "Playwright's," though, there's no discernible joke - not even a really korny one - to justify the misspelling. The only reasonable excuse would be if a Mr. or Ms. Playwright were the proprietor or prorpietress. If that's not the case, Playwright's is one of the worst names for a location I have ever seen.
I'm all for misspelling words for some specific purpose. Kids' Korner, for example - replacing the C in Corner with a K creates some visual interest by making both words start with the same letter.
With "Playwright's," though, there's no discernible joke - not even a really korny one - to justify the misspelling. The only reasonable excuse would be if a Mr. or Ms. Playwright were the proprietor or prorpietress. If that's not the case, Playwright's is one of the worst names for a location I have ever seen.
Friday, February 08, 2008
For the Blogroll - Holy Fucking Shit
Holy fucking shit Lux is finally blogging. All it took was a global Internet disaster.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Pentathlete Profile: Pat Feehan
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #3: Pat "Expat" Feehan
Hails from: Mili-waukee, County Cork (Ireland), Minnesota
Get to know Pat...
By Day: Pat is an internet conspiracy theorist with a specialty in refuting email "hoaxes"
By Sport: Snow Shoveling, Lottery Scratch Off Games, Getting Frustrated by Minnesotan Teams
Pentathletic Strengths: Experience and moxy. This man is a pentathlon legend, winning both the 1967 and 1995 events in rural Minnesota.
Professed weakness: Known to settle disputes violently in a Burr-like "duel"
Intangibles:
Pat claims his experience (read age) will make up for a loss of hand-eye coordination (he's lost one hand and an eye, not the coordination).
Pat's trash talk is infamous, routinely forcing his competitors to fall upon their swords (see 1967 Pentathlon).
Quotable Pat: "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines."
Did you know?: Pat is now a citizen of Ireland. He routinely conducts clandestine operations against his former home, Wisconsin. Wisconsin does not seem to notice.
Further Editor's Note: I was drunk when I did this, so if there are format errors, I'm sorry.
Pentathlete #3: Pat "Expat" Feehan
Hails from: Mili-waukee, County Cork (Ireland), Minnesota
Get to know Pat...
By Day: Pat is an internet conspiracy theorist with a specialty in refuting email "hoaxes"
By Sport: Snow Shoveling, Lottery Scratch Off Games, Getting Frustrated by Minnesotan Teams
Pentathletic Strengths: Experience and moxy. This man is a pentathlon legend, winning both the 1967 and 1995 events in rural Minnesota.
Professed weakness: Known to settle disputes violently in a Burr-like "duel"
Intangibles:
Pat claims his experience (read age) will make up for a loss of hand-eye coordination (he's lost one hand and an eye, not the coordination).
Pat's trash talk is infamous, routinely forcing his competitors to fall upon their swords (see 1967 Pentathlon).
Quotable Pat: "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines."
Did you know?: Pat is now a citizen of Ireland. He routinely conducts clandestine operations against his former home, Wisconsin. Wisconsin does not seem to notice.
Further Editor's Note: I was drunk when I did this, so if there are format errors, I'm sorry.
While We're At It
I forgot to mention the Twix bar.
Also, fittingly, this is post #200. I'd like to thank Mom and Dad, without whom none of this would be possible!
Also, fittingly, this is post #200. I'd like to thank Mom and Dad, without whom none of this would be possible!
On the Frequent Need for a Suitable Sixer
As I was walking up DeKalb toward home I knew I was going to buy a sixer at the Halal place by Washington Ave. As I got past the park I started to worry, because normally by then I would have decided the brand or at least the yeast. But it just wasn't coming to me.
Certainly not a Blue Moon - those are clear, mild and easily understood. Sierra Nevada Pale Ale is a mainstay but mainly for celebrations. Budweiser tallboys get to work fast but I had done that the other night and didn't feel like dealing with the wide mouth. Miller Lite is always out of the question. No one sells High Life in my rounds except the Chinese guy on 8th between Broadway and 6th Ave (obviously I'm not sure where exactly).
The worry had matured into sincere disorientation by the time I opened the door to the mart. Luckily, the ghost of King Lear or my great grandfather or someone whispered in my ear, "Don't worry. You'll know what to do when you get to the fridge."
The old man was right. Sitting behind the sliding door was Lagunitas IPA of Petaluma, Calif., a vestige of the Tacoma days and a brooding, gritty beer that could chip your teeth. Perfect for the silence of my empty apartment.
Tomorrow there will be another. But tonight, I've got Petal Town's favorite lady on my lips.
Certainly not a Blue Moon - those are clear, mild and easily understood. Sierra Nevada Pale Ale is a mainstay but mainly for celebrations. Budweiser tallboys get to work fast but I had done that the other night and didn't feel like dealing with the wide mouth. Miller Lite is always out of the question. No one sells High Life in my rounds except the Chinese guy on 8th between Broadway and 6th Ave (obviously I'm not sure where exactly).
The worry had matured into sincere disorientation by the time I opened the door to the mart. Luckily, the ghost of King Lear or my great grandfather or someone whispered in my ear, "Don't worry. You'll know what to do when you get to the fridge."
The old man was right. Sitting behind the sliding door was Lagunitas IPA of Petaluma, Calif., a vestige of the Tacoma days and a brooding, gritty beer that could chip your teeth. Perfect for the silence of my empty apartment.
Tomorrow there will be another. But tonight, I've got Petal Town's favorite lady on my lips.
Lou Dobbs Gallery for Two, Please
Time to clear the air. It may be obvious that I'm not Lou Dobbs' biggest fan (he is).
At any rate, Los Blogueros are badass.
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Kickflip Over BMX Double Hump
Wheeeeeee!
From April 2008 Skateboarder Magazine cover. Did I mention that's a kickflip?
From April 2008 Skateboarder Magazine cover. Did I mention that's a kickflip?
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Pentathlete Profile: Ed Marion
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #2: Ed "Moves" Marion
Hails from: El Paso, TX , Dirty Jerz, Nineveh Province of I-Rock
Get to know Ed....
By Day: Ed is the wheels and cogs of the US Army. Literally.
By Sport: Street Ballin', Dance Dance Revolution, Celebrity watching
Pentathletic Strengths: Alcoholic tolerance
Professed weakness: Poker. Known to declare, "My stars, what a hand" when bluffing
Intangibles:
Ed's attention span. When focused, Ed's a machine. When distracted by bright colors and moving objects, Ed tends to wander. Literally.
The incorporation of his infamous dance moves into the events will make or break his team.
Quotable Ed: "Homer Simpson: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
Did you know?: Ed won the first (and last) Mosul Idol competition this past July.
Tomorrow's Featured Pentathlete: Patrick Feehan
Pentathlete #2: Ed "Moves" Marion
Hails from: El Paso, TX , Dirty Jerz, Nineveh Province of I-Rock
Get to know Ed....
By Day: Ed is the wheels and cogs of the US Army. Literally.
By Sport: Street Ballin', Dance Dance Revolution, Celebrity watching
Pentathletic Strengths: Alcoholic tolerance
Professed weakness: Poker. Known to declare, "My stars, what a hand" when bluffing
Intangibles:
Ed's attention span. When focused, Ed's a machine. When distracted by bright colors and moving objects, Ed tends to wander. Literally.
The incorporation of his infamous dance moves into the events will make or break his team.
Quotable Ed: "Homer Simpson: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
Did you know?: Ed won the first (and last) Mosul Idol competition this past July.
Tomorrow's Featured Pentathlete: Patrick Feehan
Sitemeter
Sometimes my sitemeter disappears. This is disastrous for me because it means I don't know whether any more writers whose stories I like are stumbling onto this blog. Plus I need to know whether my employers have found this thing yet.
If you see my sitemeter please email it back to me. It must have peeled off or something.
If you see my sitemeter please email it back to me. It must have peeled off or something.
Pentathlete Profile: Andrew Tein
Editor's Note: In honor of the upcoming inaugural Daniel Feehan Pentathalon - a grueling three-day athletic competition testing some of the nation's best and brightest in the fields of Jenga, Texas Hold 'Em, Frisbee Golf, Foosball and Ping Pong - Ideelz, in conjunction with the event's namesake, is publicizing the vital stats of each competitor as part of an ongoing series. The event is to pop off Feb. 16-18, 2008 in Belton, Texas.
Pentathlete #1: Andrew "Yangtze" Tein
Hails from: Washington, D.C., Hong Kong, Houston
Get to know Andrew....
By Day: Tobacco Lobbyist
By Sport: Equestrian Golf, Synchronized Swimming, Dogfighting
Pentathletic Strengths: Jenga
Professed weakness: Frisbee-related events
Intangibles:
Andrew can carry a conversation.
Andrew has a history of ankle issues which should not impact his performance.
Andrew has never won anything athletic, but he is willing to start.
Quotable Andrew: "I just hope everyone has a nice time."
Did you know?: Andrew has been tasked with removing the smog from Bejing for the upcoming Olympic games.
Tomorrow's Featured Pentathlete: Ed "Moves" Marion
Pentathlete #1: Andrew "Yangtze" Tein
Hails from: Washington, D.C., Hong Kong, Houston
Get to know Andrew....
By Day: Tobacco Lobbyist
By Sport: Equestrian Golf, Synchronized Swimming, Dogfighting
Pentathletic Strengths: Jenga
Professed weakness: Frisbee-related events
Intangibles:
Andrew can carry a conversation.
Andrew has a history of ankle issues which should not impact his performance.
Andrew has never won anything athletic, but he is willing to start.
Quotable Andrew: "I just hope everyone has a nice time."
Did you know?: Andrew has been tasked with removing the smog from Bejing for the upcoming Olympic games.
Tomorrow's Featured Pentathlete: Ed "Moves" Marion
Why Not?
Every publication everywhere should endorse a presidential candidate. It's fun!
Money in the mouth:
Republican candidate: Mike Huckabee - Once fat and funny, now funny. Hard to beat that.
Democratic candidate: Barack Obama - If he added an apostrophe in there and had been born a mere matter of centuries earlier, I'd be reading about him in Wars of the Irish Kings. He's a little lean, but looks like he could handle a rapier. Plus: he makes young people crap their pants in excitement.
Money in the mouth:
Republican candidate: Mike Huckabee - Once fat and funny, now funny. Hard to beat that.
Democratic candidate: Barack Obama - If he added an apostrophe in there and had been born a mere matter of centuries earlier, I'd be reading about him in Wars of the Irish Kings. He's a little lean, but looks like he could handle a rapier. Plus: he makes young people crap their pants in excitement.
Monday, February 04, 2008
The World Is a Different Place Today
I've been pretty resolutely on the fence about the whole election situation and through negligence and ignorance did not register to vote on this most Super of Tuesdays. However, many of my friends who know something about politics and ideas have been pretty forthright about their support for Barack Obama, a young senator from Illinois who, as near as I can tell, is running on hope, change, and the idea that the Iraq war never even looked like a good idea. I guess I can get behind each of those. Not that it matters right now.
Okay on to the video above, which made its YouTube debut Saturday.
Yes, the BEP are and have been ridic since basically when they came out and for them to make a video endorsing a presidential candidate is also a ridic idea. But it taps into something a friend of mine told me on New Years Eve about Obama's speech at the Jefferson Jackson dinner: "See? The fact that he can make people like us care at all about what happens is what makes him so unique. We're not supposed to have feelings about politics."
Yes, politicians are rarely inspiring and I am not predisposed to caring one way or another about whether someone wins unless they are complete knuckleheads who put my friends in a desert to be shot and blown up for no justifiable purpose.
But the worm feels as though it's turning in my loins here. I kind of get a tingle when I hear Obama's voice and I almost want to believe that he really would make the country better.
I certainly like that the Black Eyed Peas made a video of him talking and them singing and that they probably believe this will in some way help the world become a better place. It's hard to imagine any hip-hop artist doing that for Hillary or anyone else in the race (maybe Edwards, or - call me bananas - Huckabee).
And that there is a candidate who can inspire this kind of conceit - a candidate who creates a world in which YouTube exists so people can make music videos about their favorite political candidates -- strikes at my (however perverted) sense of what America should be like.
So alright Barack Obama, I'm sort of listening, and you have Will.I.Am to thank for that.
Reversal!
Various people have indicated at various times that Google is really a master spin artist. During the net neutrality debate, the search dominatrix took a tone of moral authority and violently defended neutrality as a necessary freedom. Google neglected to mentioned that neutrality was also best for its business.
The company hasn't stopped the charade. Google said today that the Internet should not be controlled by a single behemoth, which is awk, because everyone knows Google controls the internet.
The people who believe in Yahoo! - I know a guy - are probably rejoicing right now. In 2008, Google will be the dynasty to beat, and Microsoft and Yahoo! a patched-up team of proven losers.
Also, the Giants beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl last night.
Just sayin'.
The company hasn't stopped the charade. Google said today that the Internet should not be controlled by a single behemoth, which is awk, because everyone knows Google controls the internet.
The people who believe in Yahoo! - I know a guy - are probably rejoicing right now. In 2008, Google will be the dynasty to beat, and Microsoft and Yahoo! a patched-up team of proven losers.
Also, the Giants beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl last night.
Just sayin'.
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Link, Friend, Link Link
-Suicide Attempts By U.S. Soldiers This is apparently another result of the government's continued mistreatment of its favorite rallying flag. There is anecdotal evidence of a mounting drug problem among troops as well.
-Lawrence blogs about the DRC for Africa Matters. Also see his analysis for the Diplomatic Courier.
-Could a Will Smith movie actually seem palatable? There's definitely more to be said about this but I can't quite figure out what at present.
-Epicly Later'd stepping up its game to do a 16-part (!!!!) series on John Cardiel. Cardiel is famous for his rail- and bowl-slaying part in Transworld's Sight Unseen video and for generally stepping up to the plate harder than younger pros who should be way hungrier. The intro monologue about his brush with paralysis says a lot about him and the brighter side of the skateboarding ethic generally.
-Lawrence blogs about the DRC for Africa Matters. Also see his analysis for the Diplomatic Courier.
-Could a Will Smith movie actually seem palatable? There's definitely more to be said about this but I can't quite figure out what at present.
-Epicly Later'd stepping up its game to do a 16-part (!!!!) series on John Cardiel. Cardiel is famous for his rail- and bowl-slaying part in Transworld's Sight Unseen video and for generally stepping up to the plate harder than younger pros who should be way hungrier. The intro monologue about his brush with paralysis says a lot about him and the brighter side of the skateboarding ethic generally.
The Time for Action … Is Now?
Editor's Note: Ideelz is pleased to welcome its first-ever guest blogger, recent golden-star award winner and military aficionado Daniel Feehan. Daniel is a First Lieutenant in the U.S. Army and writes occasionally for publication on evite.com. He currently lives in Texas.
I am the American dream,
The rape of Africa
The undying machine,
The overpriced medicine,
The murderous regime,
The tough guy's front
And the one behind the scenes
-fiasco, lupe
Whilst my wheels spin in a boundless state, mentally retarded women are remotely detonated in loose statements of religious fanatacism. Hill-dog will look at the options, Barackus will offer white man an out, Johnny Mc will find honorable victory at the cost of dishonor, and I will battle america's identity crisis on foreign shore. Men will be brave and some men will hurt, but will Britney live?
F150s line endless highways of a land too big to understand. Cows cross roads and stare at man, also grazing. Pride is farmed in balls of foot and sold in marts of wal, and when storms come out of the east, surely this is its ow-n country.
The eyes of Texas are upon you,
all the live long day.
The eyes of Texas are upon you,
You cannot get away.
-alma mater, uTejas
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Friday, February 01, 2008
One More, Then Hitting the Showers
A good line from ESPN.com's Mike Sando on the prospects of a Giants Super Bowl win:
The Giants might pull the upset -- Eli Manning is playing like a champion -- but picking against New England is like hitting on 18 in blackjack. You get credit for good fortune, not smarts, if you happen to draw a three.
Hi!
Per Sitemeter, someone from New Mexico got to ideelz by Googling "Evan Lavender-Smith." This is either the man himself or someone who likes his stuff too. If you are said Googler, thanks for dropping in and if you're Evan Lavender-Smith, say hi. Say hi even if you're not Lavender-Smith. Say hi even if you're not the Googler. If you're the Hamburgler, say rubble rubble.
"Appalachian Spring."
Ballin.
If you never come back, it was good while it lasted. Enjoy the weather.
Also, don't be embarrassed. We've all Googled our new friends or ourselves. It's a sign of respect, or self respect.
"Appalachian Spring."
Ballin.
If you never come back, it was good while it lasted. Enjoy the weather.
Also, don't be embarrassed. We've all Googled our new friends or ourselves. It's a sign of respect, or self respect.
Similar, but Different
From Leda and the Swan entry, Wikipedia:
Those were different times (see below).
The subject undoubtedly owed its sixteenth-century popularity to the paradox that it was considered more acceptable to depict a woman in the act of copulation with a swan than with a man.
Those were different times (see below).
What Goes On: Modeling
From conversation:
(emphasis added, subsequently removed).
me: hey
Speedra: yo
me: what's goin on
Speedra: not much
trying to get a new project goign in the lab
me: cool
bout what
Speedra: radiation response of tumors
trying to predict response
based on a pre treatment biopsy
using RNA microarrays which measure gene expression of the tumor tissue
basically
collect 54000 pieces of info about the tumors
and then train that data
by telling the modeling program
this is a responder, this is a non responder
me: wow
do you think you'll get something good?
Speedra: i dont know
it seems easy
like
when i first got here
i was like
oh ya
no big deal
but the analysis is complicated
and it doesnt always work
you have to try your best to eliminate any other variables in the samples
anyways
dude
i gots to run
ill talk to you later
(emphasis added, subsequently removed).
It's Life and Life Only
In a begginging of "The Second Battle of Moytura," the first story in Wars of the Irish Kings (David W. McCullough. Three Rivers: New York, 2002. 6–7.), a dispute over who should govern Ireland arises after King Nuadu loses his hand in battle. (Apparently one should not rule one-handed.)
After some flimflam, the people who decide these things settle on Bres, an illegitimate child of Eiru. The author then describe Bres' conception. Eiru is coolin out on the beach when a silver boat pulls up. On closer examination, the boat turns out to be a man who wants to have sex with Eiru.
The courtship is short:
One Hour Later:
The ship-man (who finally tells Eiru he's Elatha mac Delbaith, king of the Fomoire) goes on to tell Eiru that she will bear a child who will rule Ireland and drive out invaders.
Assuming the sex was consensual (maybe a big assumption, but Elatha does have "golden-yellow hair down to his shoulders"), this passage adds to a long list of sex scenes from the sixteenth century and before where a god or king comes along and gets busy with a fine woman. Elatha doesn't have to say or do much to convince her, and the news of pregnancy either isn't a big deal to Eiru or is not discussed as such. Nota bene: she says specifically the two things that are bothering her, and neither one has to do with the act of sex itself; that appears to have gone off fine.
Instances of this kind of encounter abound. Courtly love stories in chivalric tales, Leda and the Swan, the Immaculate Conception, etc. all play with this notion of impulsive sex whose consequences are either neutral or incredibly positive. Again, the line between rape and sex here is poorly drawn. All I'm saying is it's conceivable within these stories' frameworks that the sex was consensual (so don't come bangin at me about Leda -- I'm well aware). Because the discussion of these scenes is so offhand, there's some reason to believe that the audience understood sex in a similar way.
I'm picturing a time before there was much to do but work in a field or be a landowner who had to fight to protect his land. Men and women just sort of got together and had sex, and if there was conception, they either got married or otherwise went along. The Church had ideas about feminine purity, whatever, but as a practical matter people probably did the deed a fair amount.
The coupling is important mainly as a generative act in these tales, as opposed to an act of any other kind. The window dressing around it is not that important to the narrator or to the audience; the important thing is that it did happen.
This is a very different approach to sex.
After some flimflam, the people who decide these things settle on Bres, an illegitimate child of Eiru. The author then describe Bres' conception. Eiru is coolin out on the beach when a silver boat pulls up. On closer examination, the boat turns out to be a man who wants to have sex with Eiru.
The courtship is short:
The man said to her: "Shall I have an hour of lovemaking with you?"
"I certainly have not made a tryst with you," she said.
"Come without the trysting!" he said.
One Hour Later:
"Why are you crying?" he asked.
"I have two things that I should lament," said the woman, "separating from you, however we have met. The young men of the Tuathe De Danann have been entreating me in vain -- and you possess me as you do."
"Your anxiety about those two things will be removed," he said.
The ship-man (who finally tells Eiru he's Elatha mac Delbaith, king of the Fomoire) goes on to tell Eiru that she will bear a child who will rule Ireland and drive out invaders.
Assuming the sex was consensual (maybe a big assumption, but Elatha does have "golden-yellow hair down to his shoulders"), this passage adds to a long list of sex scenes from the sixteenth century and before where a god or king comes along and gets busy with a fine woman. Elatha doesn't have to say or do much to convince her, and the news of pregnancy either isn't a big deal to Eiru or is not discussed as such. Nota bene: she says specifically the two things that are bothering her, and neither one has to do with the act of sex itself; that appears to have gone off fine.
Instances of this kind of encounter abound. Courtly love stories in chivalric tales, Leda and the Swan, the Immaculate Conception, etc. all play with this notion of impulsive sex whose consequences are either neutral or incredibly positive. Again, the line between rape and sex here is poorly drawn. All I'm saying is it's conceivable within these stories' frameworks that the sex was consensual (so don't come bangin at me about Leda -- I'm well aware). Because the discussion of these scenes is so offhand, there's some reason to believe that the audience understood sex in a similar way.
I'm picturing a time before there was much to do but work in a field or be a landowner who had to fight to protect his land. Men and women just sort of got together and had sex, and if there was conception, they either got married or otherwise went along. The Church had ideas about feminine purity, whatever, but as a practical matter people probably did the deed a fair amount.
The coupling is important mainly as a generative act in these tales, as opposed to an act of any other kind. The window dressing around it is not that important to the narrator or to the audience; the important thing is that it did happen.
This is a very different approach to sex.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)